On very rare occasions, themes from a few books come together – forming one single coherent thought. The thought forms slowly as the mind tries different combinations of words and ideas. The closer the thought to forming, the more the mind will race and wrestle with it. Then, in what feels like a flurry– for the briefest of moments – the thought lives.
In that moment the mind sighs, rests, and is content. This is a landing.
And then it is gone.
This is the first of what I will call a Landing Post. It is a summary of themes pulled from a few different books into a lesson or an idea.
I am not a good writer. Or at least that is what I have been told or made to believe. I am a scientist and engineer by training. This means I am to hate writing and love math. Math and science are certainly noble justifications for my poor writing. At nearly every stage of my adult life, I have been told me that I am a poor writer. “Don’t worry,” they tell me – this is totally okay given the rigor of science and math.
That is, it was okay – until I decided I wanted to write a book. No. I needed to write a book.
The last three books reviewed helped me chart a path to the realization that maybe I am not as bad a writer as I had been telling myself for decades. Here’s how it all went down…
“The War of Art”
Read: December 2018
Everyone is afraid to create. Everyone is afraid to try something new. Everyone is afraid of judgement. Everyone has fear.
And everyone has Work to do.
And in response to that fear, we create an incredible weave of distractions to keep us from doing what we know – deep down – we need to do. Our life’s work.
I am not saying this kind of writing is my life’s work. But writing anything at all is lightyears away from what everyone has told me my work should be. Thank you Steven Pressfield for helping me use my fear as a guide – and point me away from a life hiding to a life of trying.
“The Coaching Habit”
Read: September 2018
Unlike writing, I have been told since I could speak, walk, and point a knife-hand that I was a leader. I led in high school in sports, and work, extracurricular activities, and of course, my siblings. Leadership drove me to join the military. Leadership then, became my living. Multiple deployments, hundreds of soldiers, and countless missions reinforced and refined my leadership methods. Leading was me. I nailed it.
Until I didn’t.
Leaving the military forced me into a situation where my results oriented, single-person decision-making leadership (so many hyphens!) style didn’t work. I was efficient at planning and executing missions. I was a professional at “leading-by-driving.”
Learning how to use listening as a tool to help people find their own solutions meant I too was building deeper trust and finally seeing people at their best – that is – when they learn and grow. “Leading-by-driving” became “leading-by-guiding” as people chose on their own, the right spot rather than me just putting them there. And WOW – so much better!
Thank you Michael Bungay Stanier for opening my mind to 360 degree leading. Mostly guiding, pushing when I must, and listening always.
“Originals”
Read: October 2016
Read again: July 2019
What is courage?
You’d think I would have a pretty clear answer for this with the whole “military, war, deployment” thing. I thought I did. But I actually only knew OF courage. People who were courageous. Actions that were valorous. Courage as a trait observed – but not known or felt.
Until I was afraid.
And a little lost.
Courage
Thank you Adam Grant for giving me the courage to be myself.
Turns out I am just human. Afraid of failure, sharply attuned to judgment, and terrified of criticism.
I also have Work to do. I decided to stop hearing fear and start listening openly. With that choice, I took the first step toward doing my Work.
This is courage.
I wish we had a like button!
tk
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